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A parody of "The Mob Song" from Disney's Beauty and the Beast
Original Music by Alan Menken
Original Lyrics by Howard Ashman
Parody Lyrics by Tony Goldmark and Kyle Kallgren


KYLE: We’ve been wasting all our lives
Throwing money to the wind
I’ve been spending my life savings buying all these stupid pins!
I’ve been going into debt from shopping at the Disney Store!
Now it’s time to show resistance, folks - it’s TIME TO SAY NO MORE!

There’s a monstrous conglomerate
It’s circling like a vulture
It won’t rest until all culture’s in its grip
They got Marvel and Star Wars and ABC and Muppets
And now even Maker Studios and Blip
Kenneth Graeme, A.A. Milne, P.L. Travers
All consumed and entombed in this house
When they’re done, call Tom Hanks
And they’ll “save Mr. Banks”
What a crock! CUT THE SCHLOCK!
Kill the mouse!

We get stung when we’re young
And they keep us hooked until we die
It’s worse than the tobacco industry
JERK: Come on Kyle! Give a smile!
Don’t you have a hashtag Disney Side?
KYLE: Why certainly! I spell it with a C!
Yes the mouse is a rat, it’s a vermin
It’s the right parasite to delouse
Grab your torch, mount your hate
Make the rodent meet its fate!

M-I-C, K-E-Y
Why? Because you ruin everything
And so assassination we espouse
Call Judge Doom, get some Dip
Make the rodent take a sip
And let producers back on Blip!

When you wish on a star
Mickey shows up in your living room
And buys your very soul like you were Faust!
It’s a trap! It’s a crime!
Mickey’s running out of time
We’re gonna clean up Anaheim
And kill the --


from Brows Held High: Beauty and the Beast, released September 26, 2014
TONY GOLDMARK as Some Jerk With A Camera




Tony Goldmark Los Angeles, California

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